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May 19, 2005
The Little Things
The subject of isolation and HIV has been batted around on the Living With forum lately. I was thinking about that yesterday. I think sometimes it's harder to deal with the little things that seperate us, then the bigger issues.
I guess I already had this on my mind. There were 2 posts on the Fears Forum that I happened to read yesterday. In both the word "clean" was used as meaning a person not infected. Clothes are either clean or dirty. Dishes are either clean or dirty. My truck is either clean or dirty....most often dirty. So if clean means not infected, then conversly, being infected must mean you are dirty. It draws a line. Either you are or you aren't.
Now I know that the people that post in the Fears section probably have no idea how this one little word can affect people living with HIV. It's not a big issue, but it keeps coming up....something akin to the 'Chinese Water Torture'.
The other night I happened to watch "Dog, The Bounty Hunter". On this episode they were picking up a guy that is an IV drug user. The issue of him probably having AIDS was brought up and a big deal was made about gloves, and not touching him any more than they had to. Now, I realize that precautions may need to be taken. However while they showed his track marks, I didn't see that he was bleeding anywhere. But they went to the extreme with all the 'Don't touch him' crap...making it sound as if you can't even touch the skin safely. It just sends the message that we are dangerous people. I don't see myself as particularly dangerous person. Certainly not enough to strike terror in bounty hunters.
It's the conversations you sometimes overhear at work. Misconspections being perputuated. You want to open your mouth and set the record straight, but in doing so you risk exposure...so the mouth stays closed and the distance between us all grows greater.
It's these little things that cause us to live in a world of half-truths and double lives. It's these little things, that on their own don't amount to much, but day after day add up to the isolation we all sometimes feel.
Posted by aster1961 at May 19, 2005 07:35 AM
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