HIV Does Not Affect Change, We Do!

I don't know if I am missing something, but I just don't understand when I hear people talk about how HIV is the greatest thing that ever happened to them. Huh? They will then continue on how getting HIV has allowed them to reassess their life and goals or made them a better person, etc. and all I can ask is "what can they be thinking?" Or the strangest line I have heard is when someone says that, "HIV is the greatest gift that they have ever received" and all I can imagine is how dismal their lives must have been to have HIV represent the greatest gift that they ever received. How a deadly virus can equate with a gift is beyond my grasp. What I can believe however is they might be confusing HIV's role in their life, because HIV never gave anyone anything, other than HIV.

What I think happens is that people are confusing the virus for the much needed wakeup call that contracting HIV can represent to many people. But HIV, onto itself is nothing more than a virus; it cannot affect change or anything else for that matter, as it remains only a virus. Maybe what they mean to say is that contracting HIV has forced them to reevaluate their lives and their direction and enabled them to make some concrete changes that will have a positive effect on their life and their infection. This is the same thing that happens to millions of people daily, when something rips their world apart and drastically changes their perspective. But you never hear a cancer patient extolling the virtues of their particular cancer.

HIV does not bring to you anything that you do not already possess. It will make you no smarter, kinder, nor happier than before your infection because the traits that you need for those things to happen are traits that you already have. You might become more refined, in some ways, but you will not somehow miraculously become an introvert, where you were once an extrovert. I just don't think that change works that way. Change comes from inside, utilizing the material that composes your being and change seldom reworks who we are as a person. Rather it seems to refine us and that's why I think this is more of an issue of perception.

For many of us, when we became positive, our view of life changed, many times quite dramatically, to be replaced with a different outlook, but not because of our HIV infection, but because our perspective on life changed. I think the wake up call that HIV can represent, is what can initiate personal change and so maybe the confusion is understandable. But I think we do ourselves a great disservice when we credit some deadly virus with the hard work that comes with affecting real change from within ourselves. HIV never gave me anything that I would want, but contracting HIV did change my life.

It forced me to change my outlook and to refine those skills and traits that I might have ignored for too long. It did not change who or what I am, but it did change how I react to life and its challenges. When my perspective changed, so did my goals and aspirations. Yes I might have become more compassionate and understanding, but those were traits that I have always had and now they have simply become amplified. HIV never brought anything to the table that was not already there.

No I don't think HIV ever gives any of us anything, because it cannot. If you want to be grateful for anything, why not appreciate yourself for the intestinal fortitude you possess which has allowed you to make solid healthy decisions regarding your life. HIV deserves credit for nothing, as you are the one who did all the hard work, so give credit where credit is due.