Lisa's POZ Blog

The past several days have been busy, and my attention span has been all over the place. I may jump around a bit so I'll just go ahead, and apologize now, and get it out of the way.

While I am starting this on Valentine's Day, it may not appear until tomorrow, or even the next day.
Today has been an absolute rollercoaster ride of emotions. It all started out fairly well.
I called a few of the people I value to say Happy Valentine's Day, and then set out to acheive some mundane activities of daily living.
On this day for lovers, I have busied myself with tackling the mountain of laundry that I inevitably allow to accumulate for lengthy periods, and finally putting a little spit & shine on the kitchen.

I have been fostering Christy/Serenity's(my grand-daughter) dog since Christy's suicide three days after Thanksgiving. He is a magnificent dog, whose outward appearance is incongruent of his real personality. He is a pitbull terrier(with a quarter admixture of Dalmation). Despite the bad reputation this breed has been given, I imagine that most folks would be incredulous of the gentility of this dog. Even given the knowledge that the public at large embraced Gentle Ben, a story of a bear raised by humans in captivity, people still cannot see beyond the sensationalist stories of children, and adults being mauled by these animals.
Noah was bought by Christy for Easter two years ago, while he was a foundling. Her intentions at the time, were to have an animal companion for Serenity to grow up with. He absolutely adores Serenity, and dutifully endures fingers in his face, and half hearted attempts by her to try getting on his back, until I catch her, and scold her. He puts up with Barbie & Ken riding on his back on Safari, a baby doll, and Bratz kids riding him to the mall, yet with grace, and gentility.

When my son first brought him to me in November, he was wrought with anxiety, and had taken up the habit of biting, and chewing his backside, and rump to the extent that his entire backside and upper tail were covered with bleeding scabs from his neurotic behaviour. He had been hit by a car while he was still just a young puppy, and his leg was badly broken from this singular experience. By grace, the Humane Society offered to help this dog get the surgery he needed to fix his leg, but the caveat was, that he would be neutered. Apparently the surgery was performed on his leg, and why the veterinarian didn't perform the neuter at the time can only be speculated.

He went for his surgery, clipping, and vaccinations yesterday.
He is a lovely soul, but I am really conflicted by the reality that I am physically, and mentally not prepared for the commitment of keeping him in my home.

Please allow me to backtrack.

The day of Christy's funeral, my son and Serenity came back to my house for a few minutes before we made the trip to Mount Airy, where the graveside would be held. While we were here, Sweetie awoke, and came out to mingle. She finally lay splay legged on the dining room floor, drooling copiously, and appeared to be 'out of it'.
I was understandibly alarmed, but knew we needed to be off to the graveside.

I have done exceptional amounts of research surrounding the maladies of ferrets down through the years I have had them as family members. I have been very careful to stay away from a large commercial enterprise that supplies them to pet stores, because of the inherent disease states that often follow these animals. I patronage a local ferretry who raises these animals as pets, and they are socialized. The ferrets are of clean stock, that is free of the whole disease tainted animals from the aforementioned commercial enterprise.

The real facts are, that there are common maladies that plague ferrets, and it is a crapshoot with every animal that you encounter, which impresses the spectre of finding an animal of good stock.
I have a friend whose beloved ferret died of one of these common afflictions. Knowing that it may be part of the equation does nothing to soften the blow when this loving tiny creature succumbs to the ravages of this disease.

I will describe the two most common of these diseases, but I will firstly address the commonality of one diseae in particular. We already recognize feline leukemia, which is the HIV of the cat world, but there is another similar process that has been identified in ferrets. It is the disease known as Aleutians disease. It is similar to feline leukemia, and is also a distant cousin of what we commonly know as HIV in humans.(just as feline leukemia is the HIV of the cat world.)

Running for second place in ferrets, are two common diseases. Adrenal gland tumors, and Insulinomas. Sweetie was exhibiting the hallmark signs, and symptoms of an insulinoma, but I am unable to afford veterinary care. The research I have done, recognizes that a ferret with an insulinoma is most like a human with Type II Diabetes. I have been treating her with high protein meals twice a day( as protein keeps the individual from suffering wild swings in blood sugar), and that has kept her in relative good shape.
I knew this would be no long term plan, but only sufficient to keep her stabilized until I could afford to secure veterinary assistance.

Here is where my existence dovetails with reality.

I have been existing on little to nothing for over three years, while being refused by our Federal government to recognize my inability to work. I have exhausted a meager inheritance, all of my life savings, and nearly my entire retirement fund as of this date.
I live in HOPWA funded section8 housing, and recieve a 72$ monthly stipend from the Housing Authority for energy assistance. I am able to eat with 152$ worth of food stamps each month. I have shamed, guilted, and cajoled my children to repay the huge expenditures I have made on their behalf when I was flush, and able to afford it.
Now, I'm living with sweaty palms every day.

I remain eternally grateful to the Humane Society for 1. helping me get Noah to the vet to be neutered yesterday(along with a seriously needed nail clipping, and all of his vaccinations.*) 2. helping me have the opportunity to get Sweetie to the vet for confirmation of my suspicions, and the opportunity to give her a good life quality for an newly extended period of time, with a minimal addition of a simple medication.(Prednisone, which raises the blood sugar ever so slightly so she can have a resurgance of her old playful self again)

* My tiny house is almost entirely old( and I mean really old) hardwood floors, except for tile (again, really old) in the bath, and kitchen. The wood floors have been badly gouged by his nails, and I am truly fearful of the consequences upon my leave of this residence.

Such is my life.
If you really want some excitement, I could regail you with the mind boggling stories of my my childrens' adventures, but I get carpal tunnel pains in advance of considering the typewritten event.

It seems that life keeps getting in the way of my train of thought.