Lisa's POZ Blog

When life isn’t what you want it to be, it’s the little things that make it better right? And when I say little things, I mean like the grocery store having the ½ gallon half and half I like to buy, or your favorite coffee is on sale. Washing your car when it has been MONTHS of you looking at it saying “damn my car is dirty” or the satisfaction of clean sheets on your bed. You know the little things.

I’ve wanted to buy a new couch for a LONG TIME but everywhere I looked, everyone I sat on just wasn’t the “right one.” Craig’s List, furniture stores galore yielded not one couch that was comfortable, reasonably priced or the right one.

Yesterday, I walked into a local store, literally 3 blocks from my house and bought a brand new sofa. Barely sat on it, barely looked at it, and bought it. I’m not even sure it’s the “right one” but after 10 minutes of shopping, one hour later the new sofa sat in my living room. Go figure. I guess I just came to the realization that it just didn’t matter. It was reasonably priced, nice looking and I told myself “for this price, who cares if it’s not perfect?”

Well, it isn’t perfect and I am paranoid to sit on it for fear of ruining it. I have it covered in sheets so Moe doesn’t scratch it or get cat hair on it. I find myself sitting on the floor so I won’t damage the cushions. But hey, it looks nice, well not so nice with all the shit covering it up.

I thought it would make me “happy” having a new couch, hell, it’s all I do is lie on the damn thing and watch television. That’s probably why the last one got destroyed, my big fat ass sitting on it all the damn time.

I’m trying to “dig myself out” of the muck and the mire my state of mind has become by doing “little things” to improve my surroundings, my attitude and general well being. I still can’t figure out why none of it has been working?

The AD’s have tempered my “quick to react” approach, my anger seems to have eased up a bit, but my overall malaise still exists. A very good friend told me the other day to just “snap out of it!” I had to laugh at her, I wish it was that easy. I seem to stop just short of being “me” every day.

Here's my new couch by the way