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Due to extreme peer pressure, I was asked to write an entry about the new man in my life.Ok, well not extreme, I guess inquiring minds just want to know since the last entry. I have been dying to spill it anyway. For those who have been following my blog since the beginning, you know it was a long time coming. But I also hope it inspires those who think that you can't be loved because of this virus. I use to feel that way too. And that's when it happened.......
Goddess knows my track record with men has always sucked. I always ended up with the wrong ones. I never understood why for the longest time. I even remember that someone commented in a past blog entry that it was my fault. At the time that pissed me off but now that I think back on it, it kinda was. Why? Because I was allowing myself to settle for anything, trying to be happy but at the same time setting myself up for failure.
Like anyone else looking for love or some type of connection, I had a few profiles on different HIV sites.At first, I was happy to see an interest but that soon changed. It seemed like the only responses I would get would be from people living in Africa. Who for some strange reason thought I was made of money. They also had a sick family member who desperately needed some type of surgery. Or there were the ones who lived in the United States but that's about all the information that was provided.
I can respect a person's privacy. But most profiles are not asking you to provide personal information.If you can't provide the basics, then you're not worth taking an interest in.Now imagine getting those type of responses for two years straight. I had pretty much given up hope of finding anyone.Checking the responses had now become like checking email. You don't even bother opening it, you just look at the heading of the email.
Just when I had given up, that's when I got a nibble. Someone who has actually filled out their profile. A person who has the same interests as myself. A person who is looking for the same things I am. And more importantly, he lived kinda close. And better yet, he had no problem sending an actual picture of himself.
The next step was communicating, which started out with Yahoo messenger but soon moved to phone calls. For hours, two or three times a day. The last always being before we went to bed The first being as soon as one of us woke up.Even if we knew the other was sleep, we would leave a message.This is usually what I like to call the courting ritual. The time where we both do our best to make a great first impression
After about four to six months, we were ready to meet each other. He invited me to come visit him. It had been awhile since I had a chance to get away.So, I went and after an eleven hour train ride, we finally met. Lo and behold, he actually looked like his picture.He is Puerto Rican, fourty-six years old and has the body of Adonis. Not that I am all into looks but the man gave me fever, ok...*lol* He's the yen to my yang.It's like our personalities compliment each other. I think I said that right. But more importantly he has a heart of gold. Everything about him is genuine, if that makes sense.
The visit ended up lasting a whole month. We definitely made a connection during that time. So much so that I am relocating to be with him. Not live with him, big difference because I am still independent. And so is he. I could see us eventually living together. He has said the same but we are good with how the living arrangements are going to be.We even had a mini confession. We shared things from our past that we were not proud of and accepted that the past is the past. Together we are moving forward.
To those newly infected or those who are tired of being alone, don't lose hope. Don't give up on love.It will come when you least expect it and when you need it the most.
Goddess knows my track record with men has always sucked. I always ended up with the wrong ones. I never understood why for the longest time. I even remember that someone commented in a past blog entry that it was my fault. At the time that pissed me off but now that I think back on it, it kinda was. Why? Because I was allowing myself to settle for anything, trying to be happy but at the same time setting myself up for failure.
Like anyone else looking for love or some type of connection, I had a few profiles on different HIV sites.At first, I was happy to see an interest but that soon changed. It seemed like the only responses I would get would be from people living in Africa. Who for some strange reason thought I was made of money. They also had a sick family member who desperately needed some type of surgery. Or there were the ones who lived in the United States but that's about all the information that was provided.
I can respect a person's privacy. But most profiles are not asking you to provide personal information.If you can't provide the basics, then you're not worth taking an interest in.Now imagine getting those type of responses for two years straight. I had pretty much given up hope of finding anyone.Checking the responses had now become like checking email. You don't even bother opening it, you just look at the heading of the email.
Just when I had given up, that's when I got a nibble. Someone who has actually filled out their profile. A person who has the same interests as myself. A person who is looking for the same things I am. And more importantly, he lived kinda close. And better yet, he had no problem sending an actual picture of himself.
The next step was communicating, which started out with Yahoo messenger but soon moved to phone calls. For hours, two or three times a day. The last always being before we went to bed The first being as soon as one of us woke up.Even if we knew the other was sleep, we would leave a message.This is usually what I like to call the courting ritual. The time where we both do our best to make a great first impression
After about four to six months, we were ready to meet each other. He invited me to come visit him. It had been awhile since I had a chance to get away.So, I went and after an eleven hour train ride, we finally met. Lo and behold, he actually looked like his picture.He is Puerto Rican, fourty-six years old and has the body of Adonis. Not that I am all into looks but the man gave me fever, ok...*lol* He's the yen to my yang.It's like our personalities compliment each other. I think I said that right. But more importantly he has a heart of gold. Everything about him is genuine, if that makes sense.
The visit ended up lasting a whole month. We definitely made a connection during that time. So much so that I am relocating to be with him. Not live with him, big difference because I am still independent. And so is he. I could see us eventually living together. He has said the same but we are good with how the living arrangements are going to be.We even had a mini confession. We shared things from our past that we were not proud of and accepted that the past is the past. Together we are moving forward.
To those newly infected or those who are tired of being alone, don't lose hope. Don't give up on love.It will come when you least expect it and when you need it the most.
