February 2010 Archives

"Neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night stays these courageous couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds..." So said the Greek historian, Herodotus nearly 2,500 years ago. He coined the adage during the war between the Greeks and Persians about 500 B.C. in reference to the Persian mounted postal couriers whom he held in high esteem.

It is an adage that could be applied to this year's amfAR gala, held last Wednesday night.

On that night, the snow was as white as the paint on Lady Gaga's body...and the pearls on her face...

As the blizzard slashed sideways through Manhattan, die hard supporters of amfAR (the Foundation for AIDS Research) donned their Kenneth Cole rubbers--boots, that is--and made their way to Cipriani in midtown Manhattan. AmfAR raises money to aggressively search for the cure for AIDS; it does great policy work on Capitol Hill (amfAR was instrumental in getting legislation approved around non-restricted needle exchange, among other things); it supports MSM prevention and runs programs like "Treat Asia"--an amazing endeavor based in Bangkok that you'll read more about soon on the pages of POZ!. I have recently joined amfAR's board of trustees.

A quick aside: If you don't already have a pair of Kenneth's rubber boots, get some. Someday (though not soon, thanks to Punxatawny Phil and that damn shadows of his...) the snow drifts are going to melt and you will need them! I am shamelessly hawking them because they are super cool (they look like vintage motorcycle boots) and are impervious to the elements. Trust this girl who's test driven nearly every form of Wellington and knock-off known to man, Kenneth's boots are the only ones that can go straight from slush-strewn streets to ballrooms bursting with celebrities without having to be coat checked (though I did remove mine in favor of six-inch silver platform stilettos). And the sale of the boots benefits amfAR's great work.

The amfAR gala kicked off opening night of Fashion Week in NYC and raised more than a million for the fight against AIDS. The fact that the annual event is always crawling with A-list celebs (this year: Alan Cumming, Alexandre Kerry, Anna Wintour, Brooke Shields, Carol Alt, Charity, Cheyenne Jackson, Chloe Sevigny, Christian Sirano, Cyndi Lauper, Cynthia Nixon, Donna Karan, Doutzen Kroes, Eliza Dushku, Heidi Klum, Iman, James Gandolfini, Jay Alexander, Joely Richardson, Julia Stiles, Julianna Margulies, karolina Korkova, Keith Lieberthal, Kenneth Cole, Lady Gaga, Leigh Lazark, Maggie Riser, Margherita Missoni, Meryl Streep, Michael Kors, Nigel Barker, Paulina Porizkova, Ric Ocasek, Rick Fox, Rufus Wainwright, Sarah Ferguson (The Duchess of York), Sigourney Weaver, Stanley Tucci, Vanessa Redgrave and Zoe Saldana, to name a few...) helps refocus attention on the issue.

There's always debate about whether celebrities help a cause more than helping the cause helps the celebrity but I always say, "Does it really matter why someone is doing something if the outcome is beneficial?" That said, many of the celebrities who lend their support to amfAR are knowledgeable about the issue and have been long time supporters of both the cause and the organization. Some of their lives have been touched closely by the issue.  

One of the most dedicated, and personally affected, of amfAR's celebrity supporters was Natasha Richardson, who tragically passed away last year. She lost her father to the disease and was a relentless warrioress. This year's amfAR event was extra special as it included a tribute to Natasha given by her mother, Vanessa Redgrave and Natasha's friend, Meryl Streep. I had the privilege of watching Natasha speak eloquently at last year's benefit and have always been inspired by her incredible dedication to raising awareness and money for the fight against AIDS, her grace and her commitment.  Her loss is profoundly felt.

And so, after host actor Stanley Tucci, amfAR's Chairman of the Board Kenneth Cole, Rufus Wainwright, Cyndi Lauper, John Demsey (who oversees Estee Lauder and MAC), Yves Carcelle (CEO of Louis Vuitton, and one of the evening's honorees; the other was the ever-amazing AIDS hero Elton John who unfortunately for us was performing in Vegas), Glenda Bailey (of Harper's Bazaar magazine), Ingrid Sischy (formerly of Interview magazine, now of Vanity Fair abroad...), Dr. Mathilde Krim (amfAR's founding chairman) and Lady Gaga took the stage (more on Gaga to come...), it was time for Vanessa to pay homage to her daughter.

As a daughter who has nearly died and who has had conversations with my mother about my once-seemingly-imminent death, I was stunned by Vanessa's strength. I can only imagine how difficult it was for her to speak of her loss so publicly. I marveled at her Superwoman-like power as she stood facing the crowd of more than 740 people standing in ovation for Natasha. She did not leave the stage, but stayed, bravely drinking in the appreciation pouring forth. Then, Meryl Streep toasted Natasha by singing an old Irish song. I was already on the verge of tears, but as soon as I recognized the song, tears flooded my face.

It was a song I had chosen to have played at my own funeral, when, thirteen years ago, I was trying to deal with what I thought was impending death by planning for a graceful demise. There was something empowering about facing my fears of death and planning a party around my funeral--even if  I would only be able to attend in spirit. Making a guest list, and selecting music, as macabre as that may sound, was a way for me to embrace the inevitable and try as best I could to make it pleasant for those I would leave behind. I wanted there to be song and dance and drink and celebration.

As I sat in my chair on Wednesday night, mourning the loss of a great woman I never had the good fortune to meet, I hoped that things are such that Natasha could experience the love in that room. I hoped she could know the gratitude I feel for her work--a gratitude I also feel for amfAR's work and for the work of all people around the world who have done so much to develop life saving treatment for those of us living with HIV.

Natasha Richardson not only touched my life, she literally helped save it. Were it not for her efforts, they very well may have sung that same Irish song for me, too.

While no one will replace her, we are lucky to have others who have also championed the cause with massive impact. Elton John, as everyone knows, has done such amazing things for people with HIV all over the world. Unfortunately, he wasn't able to be at the event and David Furnish, his partner, was ill. But we saw an amazing video of Elton's lifelong commitment to the fight against AIDS and Lady Gaga accepted the award on his behalf.

It was announced on Wednesday that Lady Gaga and Cyndi Lauper are the new MAC AIDS spokeswomen. Gaga--an exploding star with talent worthy of Carnegie Hall--is a great choice for a new voice on AIDS. Though just 24, she commands attention in a way few people twice her age can. And of course, we love Cyndi.

As I left the benefit (cream puffs, umbrella and the train of my dress in hand) and headed out into the snowy night, the sadness I had felt about Natasha lifted a little. I imagined her watching and hoped that she could see the next generation of warriors--and warrioresses--come to fight the fight she waged with such grace and courage. It is with her spirit in mind that we will fight on, through the snow, the rain and whatever else heaven sends our way.

Here are some video highlights from the night:



And some photos. For more photos, please go to my Facebook page!
 

Thanks to Kimberly, the librarian, at the Forman School in Connecticut who created this video as a promo for my book so students will come see me speak on April 2 with my friend Courtney Sheinmel!



It is fascinating how she distilled a 300+ page book into this quick video...so perfectly! And I love the song...Thanks Kimberly!

Today is National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day...and it is Superbowl XLIV in Miami.

Sadly, the fanfare of the second is overshadowing awareness of the first.

There's a big hubbub among feminists, pro-choicers, pro-lifers and the Christian Right about the Pam and Tim Tebow pro-life "I'll never have an abortion" ad scheduled to run during the 'bowl.

There is talk about how having the Saints in the 'bowl is breaking down racial barriers, uniting people of all colors in The Big Easy.

There was heated discussion on "Face the Nation" this morning with the NFL commissioner about the issue of concussions and what the NFL was doing to study the short- and long- term impacts (pardon the pun) of having a line backer knock your lights out. (The answer: they're still "studying the issue and examining equipment and rule changes" ((like no "high hits" to wide receivers)). I'm gonna say it doesn't require a massive scientific study to prove that being repeatedly knocked unconscious isn't good for brain function. Do we always need empirical evidence of the obvious?)

There is a lot of chatter about the throngs of men in dresses. Last week, thousands of men in drag wiggled and preened through the streets of New Orleans in homage to former sportscaster Buddy Diliberto who once vowed to parade through the French Quarter in a dress if the Saints ever made it to the 'bowl. Check out former New Orleans Saints' quarterback Bobby Hebert...

And so on and so on.

Is it just me, or is this year's Superbowl full of unusually great stories and spin? It is the networks' job to hype the sucker as much as possible so even people like me who typically avoid watching grown men in spandex tights body slam each other in a sport that is such a thinly veiled, modern-day version of Gladiatorhood that I normally can't watch, watch.

They got me. I am going to the local tavern and watching the whole spectacle unfurl in full color glory on their flat-screen plasma TV (because my TV at home is still 3-D. As in, the shape of the unit, not the effect of the image). I suppose by watching, I am only feeding the machine that manufactures things I don't like (like an irrepressible urge to have a cheeseburger despite its gastrointestinal perils...hey, but don't worry. You don't have to listen to your body's cries or adhere to common sense and the tenets of good health, you can just choke down a Pepcid AC and do what's bad for you anyway...and you won't feel any pain! No wonder the rest of the world wonders about American culture...we make pills to let us do comfortably what we know we shouldn't. How's that for self-indulgent, self-serving Capitalism?)

ANYWAY. While I am falling prey to Superbowl Sunday hype, I am lamenting the fact that we can't raise a similar level of hoopla around the issue of HIV/AIDS in America in general and in black America in particular.

Why can't we have some really thought provoking ads about HIV/AIDS in the Superbowl? (Attention network heads: The media is a critical component of public health. Please run some AIDS awareness ads in remnant space all year long...and consider giving us a 30 second slot during next year's 'bowl to save people's lives. Yes, yes, there are a million valid health concerns we need to discuss with our nation, but none so widespread, deadly, hidden and misunderstood as AIDS. You like to hype underdogs? Hype HIV/AIDS awareness!)

Why can't we openly discuss the racial disparities in our nation's health care system that make it more difficult for people of certain colors to access the basic human right of access to lifesaving medication and care?

Why can't we also discuss how football - and the leadership and idolatry it creates - could be leveraged to help educate America's youth about sexual health? Give us one cool player from each team mentioning the need for safe sex...and maybe a cheerleader or ten...

And how about those men in dresses! There has to something we can do with thousands of straight men in feather boas and Joan Crawford-esque silk turbans!

I guess my point is, we have a way to get the nation's attention. If only we could use that power to save lives and prevent people from getting HIV, to demolish the stigma around the disease and to encourage people to get tested and into care if they are positive...

So, please don't tell me that we can't do it. We can. We just need to employ the help of the mass media and perhaps professional sports. Winning the Superbowl would be an incredible coup for The Saints. A bigger one would be to win, and use their notoreity to save their brothers and sisters in need. And earn that name...the Saints...

I wanted to also share some pictures I took in New Orleans, one year after Katrina. I haven't been back since because I was so disturbed at the lack of national attention to the problem. It has gotten better,  I hear. But it will be a long time before the city is fully healed, even if the Saints win tonight and the burst of cash that must be coming into the city is well-appropriated. So, I post them as reminders that in the midst of celebration, we still have some very critical work to do to protect the people of our country, especially African-Americans who have been hardest hit by the economy--and AIDS.

It's always a good time for the Saints to go marching in.

Some pictures, from post-Katrina NOLA:

This past Tuesday, I was in Washington, DC to cover the announcement and swearing in of the 24 new members of the Presidential Advisory Council on HIV/AIDS (PACHA). Headed by Dr. Helene Gayle, the council of experts represents a diverse group of researchers, service providers and community leaders from around the United States. Several members of PACHA are living with HIV. The council also includes people who work in community based organizations that address the medical, legal or mental health issues of HIV-positive people.

The goal of the council is to advise President Obama, through the Secretary of Health and Human Services (Kathleen Sebelius) on domestic and global issues pertaining to HIV/AIDS. It is also designed to support the Office of National AIDS Policy (ONAP, headed by Jeffrey Crowley) achieve their policy goals. It will also help in the development (and implementation) of the National AIDS Strategy. (For the full skinny on PACHA click here or here). For POZ's coverage and for links to POZ stories of PACHA members, click here.

Okay, so, I have to confess: I'm still getting the press drill down at the White House. After getting up at 4:30 am to catch the Acela out of Trenton, and watching the sun rise hotly pink over a silver, flat body of water somewhere between Philly and Baltimore (and managing not to spill my tea all over me while navigating the aisles of a train moving at nearly 200 mph), I was very proud to be early for the press conference. I marched up to the gate at the corner of the OEOB (Old Executive Office Building) where the press conference was being held and where the VP and much of the executive branch of the federal government has their offices. But alas, I was in the wrong place. The last time I'd visited OEOB was to attend a meeting of "Women and Girls" gathered to help inform the folks developing the National AIDS Strategy about the needs of those of us of the female persuasion. On that day, I was an invitee to a meeting. Last Tuesday, I was wearing my journalist's hat and therefore, was supposed to go to another entrance.

To this New Yorker, an uptown/downtown block can be covered in 30 seconds of brisk walking. A crosstown block can happen in a New York minute. But rounding the horn of the OEOB (in heels) takes nearly ten minutes. And it's uphill. On a sidewalk not made for stilettos. So, I arrived at the right gate, breathing loudly into the speaker that is answered inside the bullet-proof hut at the edge of the White House driveway. Especially in this post-Salahi era, getting inside the White House gates - even after you've provided credentials, photo ID and probably nuked all your unborn kids by passing through the metal detectors - is not easy. After you get your pass and are released inside, you still have to travel a good ways to get to your meeting. But it is such an honor to walk freely down the driveway toward the White House and each time, I still move slowly, enjoying the view. I've only been several times, but each time, I can't quite believe that I am allowed to walk that close to our President's home without Secret Service flanking me. Of course, I know they are everywhere around the grounds. I can't see them, but they can certainly see me! I always wonder what would happen if I touched a toe to the White House lawn (or pulled out a single blade of grass for my scrapbook). But not wanting to tempt fate and wanting to respect protocol, I walk straight to the press area near the West Wing and await direction for where we are to gather.

It's quite a scene inside the press area. Journalists from all over sit and chat waiting for their escorts to the room where their respective press conference is being held. The last time I visited the White House was to watch President Obama sign the re-authorization of the Ryan White Care Act and to mention that the travel ban on HIV-positive people coming to the United States was to be lifted. On that day, we were escorted into a room where we stood behind velvet ropes until the President and group of politicians and AIDS advocates came in for the signing.


It was an incredible day - and being that close to President Obama and watching his eyes carefully as he spoke about his commitment to fighting HIV/AIDS overseas and in the U.S. was incredible. I believe he understands and cares about the issues impacting people with HIV. I believe he knows how disproportionately hard hit the African American community is by HIV. I'll never forget watching him embrace Jeannie White as she burst into tears after he signed the bill into life again. It's easy to get swept up into the feeling that this time, things will be different and that finally we have leadership in Washington that truly cares about HIV not only internationally but domestically. But even as I see the barriers to care fall (e.g. the passing of legislation that allows for needle exchange), I know too well that saying we'll do something and being able to pay for - and effectively implement - it is a whole other thing. As I stood there that day relieved that many people's link to lifesaving treatment was perpetuated by President Obama's pen, I couldn't help but think also of the people who lay sick in their beds watching the hands of a clock spin, terrified, while they desperately hoped that there will be enough money to enable the AIDS Drug Assistance Program to help them get lifesaving meds. (According to the National Alliance of State and Territorial AIDS Directors, the average monthly growth for ADAPs in 2009 was 1,271 clients - an 80 percent increase versus year ago.) ADAP is funded by the Ryan White Program. As more people with HIV lose their jobs and can't afford health insurance, and as more people become positive, more people will depend on the same limited resources to save their lives. It's gonna get Darwinian. According to the AIDS Institute, we need an additional $126 million in FY10 funds to support ADAP. And that's based on the current estimations of the total number of people living with HIV in America. And if you ask many of the experts, they'll tell you that HIV surveillance efforts have been underfunded at the CDC and that therefore, we really truly don't know how many Americans are living with HIV. We estimate that about 21 percent of people with the virus don't know they have it. The absolute count of people, and therefore the percent who are unaware of their status could be mich higher.

We've had several celebratory moments in AIDS history in the last several months. And the administration should be applauded for the steps they've taken to improve the lives of people living with HIV/AIDS in America. I was proud to be an American when we elected President Obama, and I was proud to be an American woman living with HIV when we said to the world, "You may come visit us, even if you bring your HIV with you." In 2012, for the first time in more than 20 years, the United States will again host the International AIDS Society's International AIDS Conference. That's amazing. It's also horrifying that we were one of the last nations to eliminate the deeply stigmatizing HIV travel ban.

The fact that the administration has reinstated the Office of National AIDS Policy, that there is dedication to developing a National AIDS Strategy and that PACHA has been re-upped with an incredible roster of people with remarkable track records fighting HIV/AIDS is all good. And I remain very hopeful that these steps indicate a recognition of and dedication to solving the problem of the HIV/AIDS pandemic.

But all of this good intent will only be as good as the ability of the people tasked with running ONAP, developing the National AIDS Strategy and serving on PACHA to implement the brilliant ideas they hatch. And that will take their relentless pressure. Political capital. A lot of money. And some help from us.

The federal government has said it will not spend in one area unless it can save in another. I think the AIDS community should also look hard at realizing efficiencies and I hope that part of ONAP and PACHA's focus will be on flushing out redundancies and inefficiencies in the AIDS world. If the National AIDS Strategy does one thing, it should be able to evaluate those groups that are getting it done, and those groups that aren't, and reallocate funds to the people who are making the greatest impact most efficiently. We have no shortage of talent, will and insight. In many of the meetings I've attended intended to help those who are shaping policy understand what's happening on a grass roots level in the community, it is said over and over that people living with HIV must be at the table. And we now have HIV positive people assigned to tell Secretary Sebelius and in turn, our President, what they need to know to stop AIDS and to save and improve the lives of those of us living with the virus. But we can't rely solely on them to do our work for us. Many of you have spoken up in the town halls-style meetings hosted by ONAP. Many of you voiced comments on the POZ.com advocacy hub. Many of you posted comments on AIDS.gov's website.

We need to keep it up.

The process has just begun and for any of the current efforts to work, they will need the support of and feedback from the community.

As I walked away from the White House this week, I contemplated the duality that I face every day. I am a journalist, reporting on HIV/AIDS. But I am also a woman, fighting for my life against the very virus I write about daily. And it is this reality that fuels me with a vengeance to use the power of my pen to help ensure that the needs of the HIV community are heard by those who need to hear them.

The president changes history and saves lives when he lays down ink on a bill.

We at POZ hope to do the same. So please continue to share your stories, concerns, dreams and insights with us and we will be sure that they make their way inside the gate, down the driveway and into the hallowed halls of the White House - one way, or another.

Below, some pictures from DC - the group shot is of PACHA plus Secretary Sebelius. That's Dr. Gayle and Chris Bates, PACHA's Executive Director, at the podium.