November 2008 Archives

Thanksgiving Day gets bigger every year. You got the eat-a-thon on Thursday, the shop-a-thon on Black Friday, then the aftermath on Grey Saturday...

But wait, it's not even over then! Because then there's the last mad dash to the malls on Sunday Bloody Sunday, before returning to work on Manic Monday, which coincides with World AIDS Day this year.

If that weren't enough, Black Friday marked the first observation of Native American Heritage Day, which will occur on the day after Thanksgiving from now on.

Speaking of Black Friday, the news about the Wal-Mart employee being trampled to death was just horrible. There's gotta be a way for humans to realize they are walking on other humans and for what? Just to save $75 on a television set... I just don't get it. This is why, from now on, I'm advising my thinblooded brothers and sisters to observe Native American Heritage Day and stay the hell away from the aptly titled Black Friday and the reckless herd of thickbloods.

As far as Thanksgivings go, I couldn't have had a better time this year. Went to my parents house up in the mountains of Lexington, and our friend Lauren and her baby, Evelyn (we covered the first presidential debate together) joined us. I got to hang out with my still-new niece, Helayna, who is 9 months old and full of smiles. Then for dinner, Gwenn and I joined Lauren at her grandparents house for a more formal affair in the evening. All in all, a very relaxed and joyous day of eating and sipping red wine.

Black Friday started early for me. Not because I was waiting in line at Best Buy, but because I woke up with a sore throat. It felt like a bacterial infection, so Gwenn took me to Prompt Care in the hopes of getting a prescription for antibiotics. When we walked in, I felt like time immediately stood still... just a bad vibe. When the receptionist told me to wait, I turned to Gwenn and said, "Let's get out of here."

I mean, really. At least take my name, so when I sit down and you call me up to the window, it isn't by saying, "Hey, you."

I'm not a snobby patient, I'm just in tune with my medical chi, and I felt like my whole day was going to be ruined if I put my fate in the hands of Prompt Care. We sought refuge at Martha Jefferson Hospital's version of Prompt Care across town, and my medical chi vibe was immediately validated.

"Hello!" The full-of-life receptionist said. "Have a seat and let me get you signed in. You name?"

Before I could take off my coat, I was back in the room. A nice nurse entered the room, wheeling in a laptop. She registered me while I waited for the doctor, who came in less than ten minutes from the time I walked through the door.

I explained my symptoms, and he asked if it hurt when I swallowed. I swallowed, and said it hurt a little, but nothing too bad. (It got worse the next day.) Then he did a throat swab, which came back negative for strep. "Probably a viral infection," he said. "I've prescribed some Vicodin for the pain."

Now, I've never taken Vicodin, but I've heard it can take the pain away. Today, when I woke up with a sore throat, that little pill made it go away in short order.

As I mentioned after the last bout with a sore throat, I was hoping to get that out of the way in time for the World AIDS Week travels, which start tomorrow. Thankfully, the travel load isn't too bad- we have two flights for four speaking engagements, three of which are happening in one state.

And, even with another sore throat, I am thankful to be educating this week, and commemorating World AIDS Day with my lovely love, Gwenn. Will be reporting the week's events here, as well as on my Twitter page.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

I'm thrilled by my most recent endorsement for My Pet Virus. You may remember these guys from The Karate Kid.

While not at their 1980's fighting heyday, the Cobra Kai Dojo is still turning out some knuckle-justice bullies who believe in the "strike first, ask questions later" philosophy. Next Monday is World AIDS Day, and I think we can all take a page from the Cobra Kai philosophy when it comes to HIV/AIDS, an epidemic that is in serious need of an ass-whoopin'.

So, if you're looking for a way to commemorate World AIDS Day, switch your Facebook/MySpace profile icon over to the red ribbon below. Let friends know that World AIDS Day is approaching, so they can join in as well. And remember the wise lessons of Sensei Kreese:

"What do we study here?"

Karate Class: "THE WAY OF THE FIST SIR."

"And what is that way?"

Karate Class: "STRIKE FIRST. STRIKE HARD. NO MERCY SIR!"

HIV has had it too easy for too long. It's time for no mercy. It's time to...

Sweep the Leg,

Shawn

Tomorrow Gwenn and I will be traveling to Storm Lake, Iowa, to speak at Buena Vista University. Storm Lake is real, even though it sounds like a town from a Stephen King novel.

Wasn't able to get out to see Twilight yet, we're planning on seeing a matinee when we get back home. Will drop Steve from the Hemo2Homo Connection an email to see if he's interested in seeing it- I know he likes his blood and vampire flicks, plus he may be willing to chime in on the unanswered question from the last blog- "Can vampires get AIDS?"

I'll be micro-blogging on my Twitter site, so if I see anything Stephen King-esque on our trip to Storm Lake, I'll report my findings there. I'll take my camera, too, in case I come across any cops on Segways in the airport. Here's the only one I've been able to capture in all my travels. I sincerely believe that Cop on Segway videos are the new UFO videos.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

Whatever I had is finally leaving my body. With the time change, and the late nights of Nyquil-induced slumber, I went three days without seeing sunlight.

But now, I'm ready to re-emerge among the living, and the bright flashes of sunlight that greeted me today in the cold, brisk, air only made it apparent that I'd missed my deadline for my 2nd book.

To have my next book- a vampire book- completed and sent to my high falootin' NYC agent by the time Twilight hit theatres was a great plan, the hope being to have my book published before the second Twilight movie sucks the genre dry. But my 10-long ailment precluded me from doing some final writing and editing, and early attempts to do so in a sickened haze proved unfruitful.

I felt defeated, as I played online poker in the darkness, the glow of the laptop making my face look paler than usual. Coughing quietly to myself, I drank my nectar of lemon and water, wondering if I'd be missing out on a chance to ride the vampire craze to much-deserved riches.

Then I remembered an article a friend sent me, just as my transformation to coughing fiend began early last week. It suggested a I had a much longer window of opportunity to slide through... a four year window.

The article suggests that vampires as entertainment thrive during Democratic administrations, while zombies rule the Earth during Republican's glory days. No, this doesn't mean I'll wait until the end of Obama's first term, but it does mean that I shouldn't beat myself up for getting sick.

Still, as Gwenn and I were catching up on our E.R. episodes the other night, there was an obvious sign that I shouldn't let my vampire book- which has a character who is HIV positive- sleep in the coffin for too much longer. In the scene, a mother asks Abbie if she can have the "talk" with her two young sons, because she is too embarrassed. It quickly becomes apparent the boys are too young, and have other things on their minds.

"Can vampires get AIDS?" One of the brothers asks.

It was like someone slapped me in the face, and asked what else do I need to finish this damn book.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

I can't take any pills for the kind of lingering cough I have right now, so my only prescription is some herbal remedies and an excessive amount of E.R. episodes.

For those who don't know, E.R. is a television show about a hospital in Chicago called County General. New interns unwittingly enter, believing they will learn what it takes to become successful doctors. Those who have been around keep the dark secret of County General under wraps, never telling the newcomers that the place was built on an ancient Indian burial ground. Hoping they will take over so that they the elder doctors can move on.

Somehow the spirits never fully tip their hand to the interns, even when a helicopter lops off a doctor's arm. Then, the same doctor perishes a couple of seasons later when a helicopter crashes down on him. I don't know about you, but I'd be putting in for my transfer after that.

But no, the young would-be doctors stay, and over the years they meet their gruesome demises, one by one, as the rest of the E.R. hopes to accomplish the ultimate in medical miracles, to cure the ancient spirits of their insatiable bloodlust.

In the last week, Gwenn and I have cleaned out our TiVo, speeding through commerical breaks for last year's hottest Christmas items, then hitting Valentine's Day ads, and now, finally, we're up to McCain and Obama ads.

The series ends in February, a dark day for thinbloods who have long enjoyed the bloodiest show to ever hit network television. I was looking for a complilation of the show's most violent moments, but only found sappy tributes to Luka and Abby's love story. I did find the original opening credits...

I started watching the show with Gwenn shortly after we moved in together in 1999. When it first aired in 1994, I was in a totally different place, living in Waynesboro with my parents.

Fresh out of high school, and two years away from speaking out about my HIV status, I was wondering how much my recent hepatitis C infection would affect my health. (Not much, as it turned out, thankfully.) So, when my mom became obsessed with this new show, I asked the obvious question.

"Haven't you seen enough hospital drama in your lifetime?"

I didn't get it.

But now, after a decade of watching it, I do. The show makes everyones' medical dramas pale in comparison. People with HIV, diabetes, cancer and whatever else ails us as humans can tune in every week, and somehow feel better about ourselves after watching an episode. As doctors arms are lopped off, when grab a handful of popcorn. When a maniac enters the E.R. and starts shooting up the place, that missed attempt by an intern to find a vein doesn't seem so bad. By the end of every episode, there you are,thanking your lucky stars that you don't have it that bad.

And really, what more can you ask for from a T.V. show? E.R., you will be missed.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

In the last week, Gwenn and I sent out about 800 postcards to colleges and universities, informing them about our safe sexiness.

Here's the one we just sent for the Spring 2009 semester.

I enjoy designing the layout for these postcards, and it just dawned on me that a lot of schools received the postcard (pictured here) on Veteran's Day. Which is oddly appropriate, since that's a picture of my dearly departed grandfather, Pop, who fought in World War II, as did my other dearly departed grandfather.

Each generation seems to have their own wars, in the literal sense, such as the Iraq War, and in the figurative sense. I know myself well enough to understand that I would suck in combat- I have a weak stomach and am only comfortable at the sight of blood if it's my own or if it's in a slasher flick. (Had a lot of experience there, on both accounts.)

But still, the battle to acknowledge sexual health, to be open about how Gwenn and I can successfully have a healthy relationship with HIV involved, is not something I take lightly. My jokes are my bullets, my lover is my calvary and, I hope, my dearly departed grandfathers are saluting me on the other side.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

How does the joke go? When God gives you AIDS, take lemon shots?

Well, God may not have given me AIDS, but he sure saddled me down with whatever gunk is going around. The coughing, the just feeling blah. In an effort to turn the tide today, I did three lemon shots.

What sucks about the timing is that I've had trouble writing this week. After a couple of days of trying, I found that my body needed to just chill out, and my mind was starting to turn on me a bit. So, instead of screwing up things, I figured I'd kick back and give myself the best chance of getting better.

What's good about the timing is that Gwenn and I aren't traveling for another week and a half. So I can veg out, even if I miss my Twilight deadline... All I can say now is Thank God for TiVo. I've been watching some ER from April- seriously backlogued there- and my new favorite show of all-time, Scare Tactics. If you haven't seen this, you have to check out this clip from one of VH1's myriad of countdown shows...

Aside from lemon shots and practical jokes, I'm ingesting a lot of stories about HIV. Like the guy in Germany who had a bone marrow transplant, which has apparently cured him of HIV. Here's a story that says it's too grueling and expensive a procedure to be considered as a "cure all". The link above claims that bone marrow transplants are a last stage effort that kills 30% of cancer patients who undergo the procedure, but the hope is that there's a scientific clue, something there to be exploited and pursued further.

For now, I'm pretty sure that lemon shots don't kill people with colds/gunk. Day two of the tangy treatment begins tomorrow. I hope to report back.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

Connecticut has determined that gay marriage is legal, squarely kicking Proposition H8 in the ol' wedding favors.

The other night I was watching Countdown With Keith Olbermann. On November 10, his Special Comment, the rant that ends his show as masterfully lampooned by Ben Affleck on Saturday Night Live, was about Proposition 8. I couldn't write it better than he says it here.

The odds of me living a full life are great. It was the gay community that fought to have the AIDS issue brought into the light in the 1980's, to make sure treatments were being developed so more friends wouldn't have to be buried. To ensure that politicians would acknowledge what was happening in their communities. To get condoms distributed and information in hands.

When I was a scared kid, afraid to tell my best friends I was positive, the gay community was fighting on the streets. On my behalf.

So as long as I'm living this full life, I will do everything to stand up and fight for this issue. I strongly believe that History will look back on this for what it is, another sorry example of discrimination. I also think it is important that we all say something about this, and reveal the push to ban gay marriage for what it truly is- an act of ignorance, cruelty and hate.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

I recently wrote about how cool it would be for Sean Strub, founder of Poz Magazine, to be appointed as the AIDS Czar by the Obama Administration.

The New York Times has already endorsed Sean. Not for AIDS Czar, but for having a cool home and being one of the best ambassador's us positoids have. In the article, Sean says, “One only needs to look at the invisibility of AIDS in this year’s presidential contest to see how our political muscle has atrophied.”

And that's why we need him. Badly.

The good news about Obama and the AIDS epidemic is that he has already endorsed condom use as a means to prevent HIV transmission. And when he recently spoke about getting his girls a First Dog, Obama mentioned the possibility of rescuing one from the shelter. Just like Sean Strub did. Hmmmm....

If President Elect Obama doesn't see it my way, I live two-hours from D.C. and have a closet full of foam board and markers. I will drive there and picket if I have to. We need people living with AIDS in positions of political and social influence, and having a knowledgeable, compassionate positoid as the AIDS Czar would be incredibly inspiring.

Yes we can.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

As we all await teenage vampire drama on the big screen, some real high school drama is unfolding in Missouri, where just last month it was reported that as many as 50 students may have been exposed to HIV.

HIV tests were offered to all students, and 97% of the 1,300 took the test. Here's to hoping that they pass. The New York Times reports that students will get the results this week. Thus far, one person has been confirmed as positive, and a health official there said, "We don't feel like we can release anything that would indicate who it was. We don't want witch hunts going on."

Amen to that.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

I said I wouldn't write about writing again. I lied.

Currently, I am finishing my second book, which is a vampire story. I've touched on this a little, not giving too many details, as not to spoil the book or get anyone excited before I even have a greenlight on getting it published.

I can say, as I close in on another self-imposed deadline, that I am very happy with how it is going. It's my first attempt at writing fiction, and I've drawn inspiration from my own experiences as a teenager, as well as things that have clicked for me in the genre. If you want a taste of the vibe, watch "Fright Night", one of my favorite vampire movies.

Lately, I've been hearing a lot about Twilight, the most popular of the recent vampire books. The first movie is hitting theatres on November 21, the date of my deadline. I can't say whether or not my book will be anything like that, since I haven't read any of the Twilight series. (My sister-in-law loves it, but I've heard some haters voice their opinions as well.)

Here's the trailer for that movie:

So why November 21st for a deadline? Because Thanksgiving soon follows, as does World AIDS Day, which is on December 1st. Every year, that means a lot of traveling for me and Gwenn, then it's home for the Christmas rush. Basically, when I go to sleep on November 21, I'm going to find myself waking up on January 2, 2009. Quite possibly with a hangover.

And I don't want my new year's resolution to be to finish the book.

Am I exploiting my ties to the thinblooded community by writing a vampire book? Absolutely. Am I hoping to have this sucker published before the film versions of the Twilight series suck the life out of the genre for another decade or so?

You betcha.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

One of the most influential musicians for me was Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails.

In high school, when I got my first copy of his first album, Pretty Hate Machine, I couldn't believe that one person, and one person alone was responsible for the music. It was the first time that it clicked in my head that I could make music for myself, and not have to rely on other musicians when I had my own "machines" at my disposal.

Of course, it took years and some tutoring from other synth enthusiasts to figure the damn things out. It also took speaking out about my HIV status at 20 to get the nerve to sing in public, but not acknowledging Trent's influence would be a major oversight.

I haven't been a loyal NIN'er over the last decade or so, though I did buy his latest album, the one he was giving away for free. I know too many poor musicians to take him up on the offer, plus, I had to pay for being an absentee fan for so long.

Also, when I heard that his was coming to Charlottesville, the day after the election, I figured I'd buy the Rage Insurance, just in case things didn't go the way I hoped it would.

Here's an example of what Trent gave, those offended by curse words should not view. (It's "Closer", the "I want to *$#@ you like an animal" song)

That's not me yelling like a fool, by the way, I just found this clip on YouTube. No way I'd go on the floor, I am fragile. Oh, speaking of fragile, I've gotten many messages asking about my well-being, seems that people heard that a Decker was bitten by Barney.

That was Jon Decker, not Shawn Decker. Also, it was Barney, the First Dog, and not Barney the big purple dinosaur. Here's the video of a reporter who got too close to the action.

Man, I'd be so rich if Barney the Dinosaur bit me. Can you imagine? The question is, would a thinblood survive the attack to cash in with the lawsuit? I, for one, wouldn't want to take that chance.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Obama won handily and currently holds 348 electoral votes to McCain's 173 finish: Barack Obama will be the next president of the United States.

My homestate of Virginia went a bit Daffy Duck, going blue for Obama. I wasn't entirely surprised only because I had the opportunity to drive around rural Virginia with Gwenn, reminding "sporadic Democrats" to vote. There were more Obama/Biden signs out in yards in the sticks than I was expecting to see, which was refreshing, especially since I live in the liberal-minded Charlottesville.

McCain's concession speech was very gracious and, coming down the stretch, he was able to show signs of why he was so well-liked back in the 2000 race, in oddball ways like his hilarious visit to Saturday Night Live. (I think he was "reverse Gored", in the same way Al Gore was handcuffed by his Democractic advisors in 2000.) During Obama's acceptance speech, he made it clear he's going to do his best to accomodate the more than 50 million voters who supported McCain. I remember Bush saying the same thing in 2000 and, being anti-Bush, I felt like I needed to not be a dick and take the man at his word.

Then, a couple of days after he was sworn in, I was walking through the Charlotte airport with Gwenn, on the way to one of our talks, and we passed a newstand. USA Today had a headline, "Bush to Close White House Office on AIDS", the story lhad been eaked to the press.

The AIDS community went nuts. Bush retracted the statement, then silently killed the office by placing incompetents and condom-doubters in high positions of influence and power. I was free to be as much of a dick as I wanted in terms of how I viewed the new president.

Now, we have the highest voter turnout since 1908. People will be watching and, hopefully, letting their voices be heard as we all do our parts to support this country that we love- AIDS, warts, and all.

I have a lot of hope as to how Barack Obama will handle the domestic AIDS crisis. If nothing changes, his young daughters, in twenty years time, will be in a demographic where HIV is the leading cause of death. It's time to get real about the epidemic, and utilize people who get it.

Which leads me back to the White House Office on AIDS and, ultimately, the AIDS Czar. I know who would make a perfect one: Sean Strub, founder of Poz Magazine.

He's from Iowa, a rural guy who moved to the big city of New York and started an AIDS magazine in the 90's, which gave information to rural positoids in doctor's office all across the country, empowering people to get knowledgeable about their own health. Sean knows the AIDS community inside and out, is politically active and aware and has a unique combination that Obama shares: an inspiring mix of intelligence and heart.

Oh, and he's a gay man. And after the passage of the anti-gay Proposition 8 in California, as well as in other states, the gay community needs to be elevated into as many positions of influence and power. I was very happy to hear Obama include the gay community in his acceptance speech.

Sean Strub's rise to the position of AIDS Czar will come to be known as Proposition AIDS. By putting someone with over twenty years of experience living with HIV in there, we'd have a real voice looking out for the concerns of those living with HIV, while doing everything possible to prevent the spread of the virus.

Please join me as I wholeheartedly support Sean Strub for AIDS Czar.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

Tomorrow is the election- vote. It's kind of a big deal.

If you are undecided, never mind what I just wrote. If you don't know by now you won't figure it out, and it's not something you can re-do the next day if you feel like you got it wrong. My advice is to sit this one out, and hope there are two candidates that are a bit more distinguishable from one another the next time around.

Plus, it's not fair to someone who has been jazzed about McCain or Obama for months now.

If you have HIV, you should know that Obama is already focusing on thedomestic AIDS issue, and supports the funding of the Ryan White CARE Act.

I live in a state that could go either way- Virginia, which means there's been some nasty business here. Reverend Wright commercials are playing around the clock, and some have even distributed flyers informing prospective Democrats to vote on Wednesday to avoid the rush... (Republicans, of course, are advised to vote on Tuesday.) There have also been reports of robo-calling in Florida, incredibly up for grabs as well, telling people they can vote by phone.

A lot of polls seem to be indicating that it will be Obama who prevails on Tuesday. But me? I'm still not convinced. Truth be told, I'm scared. So scared, in fact, I am refusing to take off my make-up from my Halloween costume, Frankenstein's monster, until this whole thing is over.

Positively Yours,

Shawn

"ArrrrrARGhhhGH!"

(Translation: "I am Joe the Plumber.")