April 2011 Archives

Here's a few clips of a few of the moments referenced in the previous blog entry...


Andy Deane, ChaCha Stowers and Conley Jones performing "Evensong" by Bella Morte
 
Then I said a few words, shared a funny moment I had with Bryce, and told people to grab some condoms.
 

Then Jdavyd Williams played a moving cover of Bryce's favorite Placebo song, "Special Needs".  An unforgettable night. Hope everyone has a great weekend ahead of them.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Yesterday started with a coffee date with friends, then I picked up an old pal from the airport and took him to his mom's house, where I had dinner with another childhood pal as well as my own loving mother. A vicious rainstorm broke out on the journey, which scared Gwenn since we had a 20 mile drive ahead of us, but it cleared up pretty quickly... amazing how nature can switch so quickly from violence to clear-skied beauty.

After the reunion with old friends in the early evening, it was off to the local goth/industrial night, Umlaut, for the Remembrance Night for Bryce Liddle (DJ Belway). His friend, Conley Jones and ChaCha Stowers of The Modern Prometheus played Bella Morte's "Evensong" with Andy Deane (of Bella Morte) singing. Then I said a few words, basically what I had written in my blog post from last week with a shout out to the local goth/industrial community for being so charitable and kind, followed by JDavyd Williams (of Oh So) singing a moving cover of one of Bryce's favorite Placebo songs.  All night long, Bryce's friends and DJs were spinning the music he loved.

It was wonderful.

There was plenty of dancing, laughing and people just enjoying themselves. It was a very healthy turnout, and Umlaut raised about $1000 for Bryce's funeral expenses.  All in all, it was more than a good day, it was great.  And last night was as good of a send off as our little, loving music scene could muster.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Recorded this gem on Friday afternoon, even though I was pretty tired from the travel to Wisconsin. Thing is, Mocha Moments with Shawn Decker has become wildly popular, registering over 50 views in just one week since it's debut. At this rate, in 12 years time I may become more famous for Mocha Moments than I am for having AIDS.

Happy Easter, all you love bunnies.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Big thanks to the Student Global AIDS Campaign for inviting me and Gwenn to speak at the University of Wisconsin Madison this week. We spoke in the Memorial Union, in the middle of a bar... was the first time a contact said, "If you want to grab a beer before the talk go ahead!"  At the moment, I had an iced mocha so I was all good.

The talk was unique because there was more than a bit of background noise and I thought- as Gwenn introduced herself and confidently spoke- that doing this for so long was really going to come in handy here. We both stayed focused, delivered our message as best we could even though there were several tables there to drink beer... I thought how surprised I would be if I were a college student and my drinking time were interrupted by a couple of sex educators. But everyone was pretty respectful, and there were quite a few people listening intently.  Plus, I kinda liked the idea of getting information to some folks who wouldn't normally seek it out, it was a challenge that I believe we passed.

It helped having one of my positoid heroes in attendance- Bob Bowers. AKA One Tough Pirate.  I named Bob my 2010 Person of the Year, because his spirit and energy as someone living proudly and loudly with HIV inspires me, and has for quite some time. Bob has been really under the weather recently, but he and his lovely wife Teresa made it to the talk, and it was so great to finally meet them in person and share a non-cyber hug and chat.  One of the highlights of doing this work is getting to meet the people who give you the encouragement to keep at it. No one sends more of that energy my way these days than Bob.

Thanks, buddy, I really appreciate it!


What I didn't know until the next day was, as Gwenn and I were speaking in Memorial Union, one of my positoid pals back home was fighting for his life. After a long morning and afternoon of travel back home, I got the news that Bryce had fallen ill and passed to spirit.  Over the last few years, I knew Bryce vaguely from the local music scene; it wasn't until after he had tested positive about a year ago- which I heard about via mutual friends because Charlottesville is such a small community and all- that we were introduced to one another.

We had coffee together a couple of times, and I learned very quickly that Bryce had such a great attitude about his diagnosis.  His spirit was unshaken- he was so far ahead of the natural process that many newly diagnosed people have to go through.  We laughed a lot during that first encounter, when I was really expecting to go in as more of a counselor but instead was greeted as a new friend.  A musician and a DJ himself, we joked about forming an all positoid dance project and scaring the audience with fake blood.  He had a sense of humor about it all, and I knew that would be crucial for him going forward.  After that day, I loved running into him afterward and seeing that smile that told me he was dealing with everything just fine.

Bryce, I wish we could have met under different circumstances.  But we met- and I'm very thankful for that even if our friendship was all too brief.

Positively Yours,
Shawn
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Attention Charlottesville Area Friends: Umlaut (at the R2 space at Rapture on the downtown mall) is doing a fundraiser for Bryce's funeral costs and to honor his memory. Here's the Facebook event page which will be this Tuesday, April 26, from 10 pm until 2 am. Hope to see you there.



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Had a big World Hemophilia Day weekend with no bleeds whatsoever.  I tried to get as much out of my friends as possible, with one pausing me to ask, "How many holidays does one guy get?" See, I pull similar stunts around World AIDS Day and my birthday. 

Anyway, I suffered another indignity at dinner with friends when I was making a humble toast.  "Thanks for sharing this meal with me in honor of World Hemophilia Day," I began.  "Although you do not know my trials, and you live in ignorance of what a privilege it is to have a proper amount of clotting factor..." I wasn't even rolling yet when I was interrupted with an exasperated, "Yadda... yadda... yadda...." Can you believe that? Well, with all the excitement leading up to World Hemophilia Day last week, I kind of made a social blunder of my own... I missed Gwenn's one-year anniversary of her blog, A Latte Style.  For a few weeks, I've been conspiring to launch a new web series/vlog for Decker's Daily entitled "Mocha Moments", so to make peace I figured I better address my oversight with Gwenn for the first published episode.

But before you watch this, be sure to visit Gwenn's blog, where she eloquently explains why starting a coffee fashion blog has been a good escape from the HIV/AIDS work we do together.  Read her words yet?  Okay, now you can watch my goofy video.  The staple of Mocha Moments with Shawn Decker is going to be the lack of an outro and my awkward style; it's hard to focus on a guest when there's a tall glass of iced mocha right in front of ya. My goal is to be the least dynamic host with HIV since Magic Johnson's Magic Hour back in the late 1990's.




Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
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Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

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Sunday, April 17, 2011. World Hemophilia Day.  It's a day when we reign down gifts and love upon the greatest gift God ever gave to this world- people with bleeding disorders... or, as I call us, "thinbloods".

We are undoubtedly the world's chosen people. Why? Because we are a loving breed.  We kind of have to be, because not having a proper amount of clotting factor makes one a very kind person by default.  You don't see thinbloods starting fights in bars, and we only antagonize others up to a certain point, for fear of our own physical well-being.  And speaking of which, I can't think of a better time to lay down some guidelines to make the world a better place for thinbloods than now.

So here's some New Rules, Bill Maher-style.

Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
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Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

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Last week in the world of politics, it was all about the threat to shutdown the government, a potentially lethal job-killing move by Republicans to get sugar-coating on some of the behind-the-scenes dealmaking that commoners like us aren't privy to.  What is known is that funding of Planned Parenthood was a major sticking point for Republicans.

Last week Senator John Kyl made an outrageous claim that 90% of Planned Parenthood's funds go towards providing abortions.  This false claim drew the attention of a lot of folks, including Stephen Colbert, who broke character when trying to make sense of the remarks of Kyl.  Thankfully, the threat to shut down the government was just a bunch of posturing, too.  I can not understand, though, how opponents of abortion can be opponents of Planned Parenthood, an organization that provides information on sexual health and contraceptives to young women all across the country... thus preventing abortions.

 

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
YouTube, Facebook and Twitter  
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

SHARE THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.

Last week was a busy one- Gwenn and I spoke at UNC Chapel Hill and also at an HIV/AIDS conference in Springfield, MA.  It's always an honor to be invited to speak, but what made the Chapel Hill visit unique from any other college talks is how it happened.

The person who invited us discovered our program through Gwenn's coffee blog, A Latte Style.  Pretty nifty- I never thought vanilla lattes and Anthropology outfits would help me raise awareness about HIV and sexual health!  The HIV/AIDS conference was a wonderful opportunity to discuss a lot of issues with my fellow positoids in the AIDS community.  I really enjoy speaking with people who really get this experience of living with HIV, it's just a different feeling in the room. There's a bond of just surviving this shit, the health issues and the personal issues that the stigma of HIV can exploit.  Most times, the general theme of our discussions is prevention, but I always try to emphasis that a healthy relationship is possible after a diagnosis with a lifelong sexually transmitted infection, whether it's HPV, herpes or HIV.  This was especially emphasized in Springfield.

Of all things I do in my little corner of the universe, there's little I love more than reminding positoids about how much we truly have to offer in a relationship. 

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
YouTube, Facebook and Twitter  
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

SHARE THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.

Got lots swirling around in the ol' nugget today, but I want to lead out with yet another remembrance of Kurt Cobain.  I know many think he's overrated and overmentioned, but this week marked 17 years since he took his own life... time flies, doesn't it?

Near the end of high school, I really got into Nirvana.  The first time I heard them was just before Teen Spirit blew up. It was a random group of guys, hanging out in someone's basement.  A cassette tape was pulled out and played, and despite the different musical tastes of everyone in the room (from Primus, to Depeche Mode, to Phish fans) we all agreed: Nirvana was awesome.

One thing I loved about Cobain was his understanding and empathy of the underdog.  Back before the modern era of Lady Gaga- a strong advocate for the gay community- Cobain rose to fame on the strength of a catchy guitar riff and an intense music video that MTV played with the feverish excitement that is now solely reserved for reality TV shows.  At the height of his fame Cobain did an interview with The Advocate Magazine, appearing on the cover to talk about how he appreciates the gay community.  Since we all know his music, I thought it would be more interesting to share this.

At the time, I probably appreciated his stance of gay issues because I'd taken a small amount of shit for in junior high and high school for having Depeche Mode as my favorite band. They were European and played keyboards, in Waynesboro, Virginia that somehow qualified as being gay. I don't know how many times I was told my favorite band was gay- so many times that I figured it didn't matter if they were or not.  It's funny, but even the thought that a band was gay, a band that had influenced me and helped guide me through the somewhat treacherous experience of puberty, probably had a lot to do with my opinion that sexual orientation is not something that matters in the slightest.

Speaking of Depeche Mode- I had the great experience of helping my friend, Andy Deane of Bella Morte, with a cover of one of Depeche Mode's classic songs. It sounds great- I'll reveal the song when Andy does. It's being done as part of Bella Morte's Kickstarter campaign to help fund their new record, After the Flood.  The Depeche Mode cover is an exclusive giveaway to anyone who donates to their campaign, which ends of April 16. So if you want the tune, and want to help a very gay-friendly group of musicians in their own right, you have a week to donate.

It was a lot of fun singing back-up vocals on a song that I'd drive circles around Waynesboro singing in my car back in the day. Glad I could put the harmonies I worked out twenty years ago to good use!

Lastly, I'm humbled by the kind response that the Synthetic Division music video has received.  If you want to hear me talk about music more, then check out an interview I did for Horrorshow Radio this week, The Life and Times of Shawn Decker.  Geek Crafts also featured the "Out of Time" video, and called me a "geek chic trifecta" due to my involvement in music and writing, as well as the fact that I named my band after math... Speaking of the music video, if you look closely you'll see a Depeche Mode music video within the Synthetic Division music video. (It's not a clue as to which song Bella Morte covered, btw!)

Hope you have a great weekend.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
YouTube, Facebook and Twitter  
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

SHARE THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.

Today is the day- make a quick call to your representatives to urge them to continue funding HIV/AIDS programs in the United States. Whether you are a democrat or a republican, these programs are necessary to insure the safety of our fellow Americans who are living with HIV. Without them, we run the the risk of losing more people to AIDS... and, really, haven't we lost enough?

Click here to find out who to call, and what to say- it's easy, and it matters.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
YouTube, Facebook and Twitter  
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

SHARE THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.




  

Here it is, my band's first ever music video, featuring stop motion and Playmobil toys- including a hospital! Funny thing is, the inspiration for this song came in part from a hospital visit in late 2009... so the creator Dirk Roth's concept really fits the song and release perfectly.

I hope you enjoy the video and share it with friends!



Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
YouTube, Facebook and Twitter  
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

SHARE THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.




  

It's tough being my own publicist, I tell ya. The job doesn't pay, and my client is a major dick. But aside from that, I can't really complain too much I guess. Just pass along info on "the boss". *sigh*
__________

As I mentioned earlier this week, the first Synthetic Division music video (created by the talented Dirk Roth) has been made, and I couldn't be happier about how it turned out.  You'll be able to see it on Monday... and, yes, like the Joy Division video I posted a few days ago, this one features the Playmobil likeness of the band.  The vid is for the song, "Out of Time" from my CD, A Symptom of Life.  I wanted to share a still and the lyrics to the song, which you can hear on my music player over there on the right side of this blog.

Out of Time by Synthetic Division

Know when, know when to try again
Know when, know when to try again
Decide to take that ride

CHORUS:
You're out of time
And that is fine
Just please don't ask
for some of mine

Know when, know when you've reached the end
Know when
You're out of time
Just try again

Don't look into her eyes

CHORUS

I warned you who knew better

Know when, my friend, know when to try again
know when, my friends, know when you've reached the end
decide

CHORUS

Last year's release holds special meaning to me, because it's all about survival. The song above is about outliving the limited expectations one faces when dealt with a terrible diagnosis, like, say, HIV.  As a songwriter, I didn't have to dig too deep to find the inspiration behind the tune.  I am thankful that I'm getting better at tapping into some of the deeper emotions behind my diagnosis. I don't struggle emotionally with my HIV status, and haven't for years... but looking back on those early days, months, years, it makes me so happy to just be here.

As a teen, I was obsessed with music videos, back when you had to stay up until midnight to see the good ones.  It's super cool to have one for my little synthpop duo.  I hope you enjoy it on Monday! 

Have a great weekend and don't get fooled today.

Positively Yours,
Shawn

Watch, Friend and Follow me on:
YouTube, Facebook and Twitter  
Website: ShawnandGwenn.com  Also check out the lovely Gwenn's Fashion/Coffee Blog
My CD, Synthetic Division, A Symptom of Life, is on iTunes!

SHARE THE BLOG. NOT THE VIRUS.